180 flip

I just spent an entire hour crying.. who knew I had so many tears?

This is the first time in my life I've ever tried for myself. Not my parents, not to beat other people, but I think I honestly wanted to prove to myself that I could succeed if I wanted to, and it worked for the most part, except for that damn math portfolio.
I suppose there's more to life than just this, but all this has shown me is that I suck at life. I fail no matter how hard I try. What kind of life is that?

I don't know how to feel. On one hand, obviously, I feel like a failure and that I'll always be a failure, but on the other hand, there's that voice in my head (and also Julianne's and Priya's and Megan's voices...) who are telling me to just suck it up and move on. That's how I always am anyway. I don't think I've ever been legitimately mad at my sister or any friend for more than 24 hours. Although I'm good at telling myself that I'm still mad.

wow I move on fast. I'm already feeling happy again. wtf?